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He asked if I was reading it for Ms. Summer’s honors English class at Sparta High,’ laughed Gwen. ‘I have to admit I was slightly nonplussed myself. His eyes just seemed to look right through me. Finally, I overcame my initial surprise and asked him how he knew about Ms. Summer’s reading assignments at Sparta. He told me that he was attending Sparta this year and was half way through the book himself.’ ‘So he started talking to you about a stupid book for English? He wasn’t hitting on you or anything?’ questioned Kate. ‘I told you to let me pick out some new clothes for you, Sis. You lost a great chance to lock this guy in before all the cheerleaders and class sluts get their claws into him.’ ‘He must have talked to me for fifteen or twenty minutes, Kate. He asked me all sorts of questions about the school, the classes, the other students, and even about my family. That’s how he knew who you were. I’ve no idea why he asked mom if she was Lisa. I told him how beautiful Lisa was, no. . 1. You are willing to park three blocks away from your house because you found shade.2. You’ve experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.3. You can drive for four hours in one direction and never leave town4 You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.5. You know that “dry heat” is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door at 500 degrees.6. The four seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??-ORYou can retire to California where...1. You make over $450,000 and you still can’t afford to buy a house.2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.3. You know how to eat an artichoke.4. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.5. The four seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud and Drought.-OR-You can retire to New York City where...1 You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.2. You can.
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